The main reason is because I was so used to finding my own income and working to determine how much I earn by being a part-time tour guide in Korea. The word being single and independent is freedommmm…at least that was how I thought before.
It was a great job, I knew so many great people who remain as my close friends till this day and learned from them a whole lot too in the process. Alhamdulillah.
Reality of married life
But after getting married, my husband requested me to just be a housewife and that means he will be the bread winner. Yes, this is a great idea if someone hates her job! It would be an amazing news to stop working and spend your time at home. However, I love…my job and wish to stay active outside of home as much as I can like before.
In summary, I was not ready to change my lifestyle just yet.
The first year of marriage, I came into a down time. I felt like a robot doing the same old same, every single day. I always wonder how my mother can be married to my father for more than 40 years, remained so diligent and not get bored? You know, the rate of couple getting divorce sky rocketed like crazy nowadays in Malaysia and it was suffice to peak my curiosity.
Until now we are still a duet and yet to be blessed with a child. I just could not adjust to the feeling and the task of a wife. It was boring!
I am a green horn
Well…someone would say, you are close to 40 for God sake! Isn’t that mature enough to act like an adult?! Yes..if you count the numbers as a gauge for being a mature person but it remains an unanswered question when a person can act ridiculously childish and feel so young inside even if they have creases on their skin as far as the eye can see, right?
The problem is that it has never crossed my mind that all my actions can be considered as an ibadah if I make the intention for it to be so. Well, I heard some people preach about it but not when it comes to practical solution. I was clueless!
Let’s just say that am I still a jahil person inside until I came across this website called as Productive Muslim somewhere around early 2015. The content of the website just boom!! Kebaboomm…hehe at me. It is as if my soul has awakened. Indeed! Subhanallah.
That moment on, I carefully plan my daily schedule using the daily taskinator from the site and this has given me a bird-eye perspective on my life. I make sure that every action that I want to do will start with Bismillah, supplication to ask for guidance from Allah and when I finish the task, I will say Alhamdulillah.
This action is considered pretty small but believe me that YOU will feel the difference when you try to start every single action of yours with the same habit. It defines us as being a helpless creature and we need Allah’s help in all…..yes, all of our action. Even when you breath, you cannot do it yourself if your heart is not pumping and guess who do that for you? Allah. 🙂
How to be a productive Muslimah housewife?
First, is to be a good Muslimah. First, is the Creator and then the creation.
I have to do all the fardh tasks for Allah then only to be a good housewife. I must be very firm on this. Alhamdulillah, I am married to a Muslim man who knows his responsibilities towards Allah first and this has helped me a lot to refine my status as a housewife.
On the side of productive, I make sure to shower myself with knowledge on how to be a good muslimah and a productive housewife. The Productive Muslim site has helped me a lot and of course, reading, processing the information and turn it into practice is something that I have to do on my own and with Allah’s help.
Early on in 2015, I took a short course from Islamic Online University for Psychology from the Islamic perspective and this course has helped me to shift my goal in parallel with what Allah needs me to do in this life. Alhamdulillah.
In July 2015, I took an initiative to study Arabic from LQ Toronto using the Madinah Arabic Book module from Dr. Abdur Rahim, all of them are free for download from the site. My commitment is to complete this study in about a year and a half which mean until end of 2016. Bi iznillah.
So far, I have completed Book 1, Alhamdulillah and currently in the 5th lesson of Book 2. I make sure that I study at least two to four hours of Arabic every single day.
It is really hard to actually discipline yourself but my husband has been a major push as he being an Arab and at home, we watch Arabic channels mostly. Alhamdulillah. So, when I watch the news, I could pick up many words that I have learned and even in the Al Qur’an! Masha Allah.
Watching Guided through the Qur’an and Traveler of the Qur’an by Sheikh Fahad Al-Kandari has been a big source of motivation for me to study Al-Qur’an and memorize my favorite surah. I downloaded all the series and watch them one episode per day to motivate me to learn Arabic and memorize Al-Quran
I wish that I could be a hafizah one day but my primary goal for this year is to complete my Arabic studies and hopefully after having a good grasp of Arabic, the understanding of the language can facilitate my memorization easier. Bi iznillah.
I implement Asmaul Husna in my supplication from the knowledge of my ex-professor of MMU, Prof. Wan Maseri and Ustaz Amin (Youtube-Kuliah Asmaul Husna). It has been a great source of reliance towards the One and Only Creator. Masha Allah, their effort to spread this knowledge has helped a lot of people including myself.
May Allah bless all the people behind Productive Muslim, Dr Abdur Rahim, Brother Asif and the team from LQToronto, Sheikh Fahad Al-Kandari and his team, Prof. Wan Maseri and her team, Ustaz Amin and his team, Dr Yasir Qadhi and his team with Jannatul Firdaus for helping me to be a productive Muslimah housewife.
May Allah help us to be istiqomah in our journey towards Allah. Aameen.